Hi, I'm Ryan's dad. Ron.
Our family has a story to tell. An amazing story about a young man growing up and going out to live on his own. Ryan's story.
If you know Ryan or our family, then you know that Ryan doesn't YET live on his own. That goal, that story is still being written. As God daily unfolds this story, I will be the teller.
Come back often as we tell the story of Ryan as he proclaims to the world, "I am learning to live on my own!"
Start with the first post, 11/29/10. You will be glad you did.
Thanks, Ron

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

What About College?

We found out two years ago about an upcoming college program that might be for Ryan.  While it appears to be a wonderful option, we accidentally ran nose first into another label.  A new one for me.  It was called a college experience program for the "intellectually disabled".  Fair enough.  All in all; not a bad label.  It's descriptive and even accurate.  We knew that since Ryan couldn't pass the exit exams he would get a Certificate of Completion instead of a high school diploma.  And without a diploma, he can't get into even the lowliest of community colleges; even to audit a class.   So, intellectually disabled it is.  While this new label may open some marvelous doors, it isn't a word I choose to use in front of Ryan.

It seems like a big circle. We are back to where we started.  When Ryan was three, he qualified as a special ed student in the public school because he was determined to be  "developmentally delayed";  a phrase that has become the catch-all category for most any student needing services at the age of three.  But, when it came time for first grade the school system had to have something more substantive to write on that line. I saw it first.  No way did I want it said out loud.  No way did I want Cheryl to see it.  But, she did.  Two little letters.  An "M" and an "R".  Our son was to be labeled Mentally Retarded.  We weren't in denial, we knew full well that Ryan's cognitive abilities were seriously limited.  But, it hurt to see it in writing.  It was explained that without the label,  he couldn't receive any services from the special education department.  Gotta' love them labels.

Last fall we  visited the Vandy program.  http://kc.vanderbilt.edu/site/nextstep/ It's amazing. The driving force is the notion to develop  life-long learning.  They have a class component, a  job/intern component, and a well done social/community package.  Plenty to like.  Do we think this is a good fit for Ryan?  Big yes.  We think he would thrive in this environment and love it, love it, love it. But, we aren't convinced that next fall is the right time. Two reasons.  First, Ryan isn't ready for college just yet.  No surprise here because many typical students aren't ready for college as soon as they exit high school.  Ryan needs to "grow up" a bit more.  And interestingly enough, the Next Steps program has raised its acceptance age to 28.  They seem to be saying the same thing; no hurry. The second reason is about the program itself.  It is new, very new.  Only two semesters under its belt. It stands to reason that the program will improve over time.  We have time.  And maybe in another year or two they will be able to add a residential component.  Or.... maybe he could end up going to college any number of places??  http://www.thinkcollege.net/

But, for Ryan; the quest is on.  We are still looking for the right place for him for next year.  I am convinced that we need help.

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